A rocky marriage may actually help men stave off diabetes

For men who are unhappily married, the findings of a new research will surely bring happy news. According to the study, men who are in a rocky marriage are less likely to develop diabetes compared with men who are happily married. The study also found if the unhappily married men develop diabetes, they do it later in life and their condition is better managed.

The study was led by Hui Liu, a Sociology professor at Michigan State University. Prof. Liu and colleagues wanted to find out if there’s a link between quality of marriage and the risk of developing diabetes. They also aimed to investigate how well the condition is managed after it develops in later life.

The researchers analyzed data from the first two waves of the National Social Life, Health and Aging Project (NSHAP).

Biomeasures and survey responses gathered from interviews and self-reports in the NSHAP data covers many aspects of social life, aging, health, and relationship in older Americans living in communities. [Read more Drinking coffee daily may lead to a longer life, new study shows]

The data on a total of 1,228 married men and women aged 57-85 were included in the study. The first wave of survey was conducted between 2005 and 2006. When the researchers conducted the second wave survey between 2010 and 2011, 389 of the individuals developed diabetes.

The data collected were not exactly designed to evaluate marital quality, therefore, a statistical approach known as "factor analysis" was used in order to build marital quality scales (positive and negative) from related study items. For example, it included reports on participants’ contentment with present relationship, conduct with mate, intimacy, sexual contact, and inclination towards partner.
The researchers made some astonishing findings, when they collated the data with the information on diabetes that were collected from the married men and women.

The most surprising of these findings was that men in a rocky marriage were at lower risk of getting diabetes, and there condition was better managed once it was diagnosed.

Researchers believe this may be because diabetes is a disease that calls for constant and careful monitoring; continuous badgering from a spouse might improve a husband’s health condition just through effect on health behavior, although it may heighten marital tension over time.

And for women, the team discovered that it was a favorable marital quality that was associated with a lower risk of developing the condition.

And, why is that? Prof. Liu believes this could be because our female counterparts are more sensitive to the quality of marriage, therefore, a happy relationship may positively affect their health.

These results also prompt questions about how to construe positive and negative marital condition, and to what extent they may vary between the sexes.

Prof. Liu concludes:

“The study challenges the traditional assumption that negative marital quality is always detrimental to health. It also encourages family scholars to distinguish different sources and types of marital quality. Sometimes, nagging is caring.”

About relationships

In the U.S., it seems that couples are becoming unhappier by the day. More relationships are ending up in a rocky marriage than ever before. A 2014 survey by the National Opinion Research Center at the University of Chicago found that 60% of people reported being very happy in their relationship, which is down 5% from only 2 years earlier.

“Sexlessness is an inherent part of nearly all relationships, but a lot of couples don't have honest conversations about relationship problems until they're at a point of wanting to divorce,” says Chris Donaghue, Ph.D., a sex therapist and author of Sex Outside the Lines. “By then, it's too late.”

Our sex drive naturally declines when we’re with the same partner. This is down to the deep-rooted human nature; humans tend to get most sexually excited by newness and novelty.

“Monogamy is difficult,” says Donaghue. “Your sex drive doesn't care about socially constructed boundaries. You have to be willing to rock the boat early on in the relationship, talk about it every step of the way, and make adjustments.”